Classic Conversations

Living with a 14 year old and a 5 year old brings some classic conversations.  Somedays I just have to laugh out loud at the absurdity of some conversations and statements.  I remember when we wished our kids would talk.  We have moved past that dream.  And I'll admit that more than once over the years we offered to pay Harrison to be quiet in the car,  Which I might add, he never collected a dime because he just couldn't be quiet.  He literally would just burst out a big old squeak because he just couldn't keep it all inside.  Now...his sister is following suit.  The other day I took the kids to Kingfisher (where I lived all through grade school).  At one point I think Clara had talked non-stop for a good two hours without taking a breath.  So I asked her if she could possibly be quiet for a little bit.  Here is the classic conversation that followed with her brother.
     H - "Yeah, Sister, you haven't stopped talking in forever."
     C - "Oh yeah!  Well, you're talking like a duck."
     H - "I'm not talking like a duck.  I didn't say quack.  Could you just be quiet?"
     C - "I love geese." 
     H - "What?  That doesn't even make sense."
     C - "Exactly!" 

HUH?  "Exactly" is Clara's favorite new quip.  Once in a blue moon she uses it appropriately (and totally by coincidence).  

Another day in the car Clara asked me to play "opposites" with her.  I named something and she named the opposite.  She did really good...for awhile....then she just cracked us up!
     J - "High"
     C - "Low"
     J - "Hot"
     C - "Cold"
     H - "Soft"
     C - "Crunchy"

HUH? 

She also has a talent for nursery rhymes....here are a few of our favorites.

      "Baa! Baa! Black sheep, have you anymore.  Yes sir.  Yes sir.  Three and Four..."  

      "Hey Little Diddle, the cat and the fiddle...."

In case you were wondering, she doesn't like "funder" or "tomatoes" (think storms, not vegetables).  And she has the Pierce family gift for song lyrics.  I'm proud to say, that Clara loves Michael Jackson.  No really...LOVES his music!  If she hears one of his songs coming on the radio, her face just lights up and she gets so excited.  She knows the entire "Bad" cd.  Honestly, she knows "Liberian Girl".  These are proud parenting moments...excuse me while I wipe the tears of joy.  Here are a few of Clara's lyrics to MJ songs....

     "I'm mad, I'm mad, I'm really, really mad"....from MJ's song "Bad".
     "I'm looking at the man in the river" or occasionally "I'm looking at the man in the liver" or another favorite "I'm looking
at the man in the middle"....from MJ's "Man in the Mirror". 

Of course, Harrison has some classic song lyrics too.  Our favorite is...

     "No fried dust, gotta make a living"....from "Low Rider"

And I'll go ahead and admit that my brother called me a total idiot when I  told him that I thought the lyrics "I want a new truck, one that won't make me sick" were incredibly stupid.  He informed me that Huey Lewis was saying "I want a new drug".  OHHHHH!  That makes a lot more sense.  And Joe argued with me at length one night years ago about the song "We want the funk" by George Clinton...he just swore the song said "we want the bump, gotta have the bump".  Of course, he was going to prove me wrong and look it up on the computer....which did not end in his favor.  : )  Did I mention that we are gifted with song lyrics.  Someday I'll tell you about Joe's gift for foreign languages too.  We are a family with many talents. 

Today we drove through Sonic to get drinks.  We hadn't driven through with Joe in awhile.  We kind of forgot it seems like he's had a stroke when he's ordering at the drive through.  He orders one thing SLOWLY.  Then pauses so long that the waiter thinks he is done and confirms his order.  Then he has to start over and add the second item.  Again, long pause....waiter confirms order a second time....but wait, he still has two more drinks to order.  So by the time he's actually finished ordering, we have all broken out in the Steve Martin ""I - would - like - a - ham - burger" routine from Pink Panther.  And we are the funniest people we know, all doing the hamburger schtick.  But I will say, this line of conversation is a great improvement over the whole "Weinergate" conversation that followed at lunch.  Geez!  We were trying to imagine what kind of campaign signs Congressman Weiner had.  Really, when you think about it, that's not an easy name to make campaign signs for.  Here are some of our top campaign slogans...
     "Vote Weiner"
     "I'm for Weiner"
     "I'm with Weiner "(with finger pointing to your neighbor)
     "Vote Weiner and be a Winner"

And on that weiner...I mean note...I'm done!